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Opposites
Attract
There has always been a question whether
opposites should try to have a relationship.
Can two people who are totally different
really get along in a long term relationship?
The answer is not as simple as the question.
There are many factors involved, communication and open mindedness
is the largest. When two people who are chemically attracted to
one another, there is little that can be done to keep them apart.
This chemical attraction usually leads off with a lust or
infatuation, therefore the relationship is usually a sexual one.
But if you fight off the enormous lustful passion and actually get
to know that person, you will see faults, the common areas and
after a short time, you will see whether that chemical attraction
is as strong as it was when you first laid eyes on one another.
Communication is the key to any relationship,
especially in the case of opposites. You can have a sexual
relationship with your opposite, but without the extensive work of
communication, simply put, it will not work. You may baste in your
euphoria for a while, but eventually the differences will surface
to a degree so high one or both partners will have hesitations on
carrying on the relationship.
In order for an opposite’s relationship to
work, there are factors you and your partner should address.
1)
Can you both live with the differences or would you both rather
share your time with someone who likes and wants similar things
that you both do?
2) What is the foundation your relationship
based on?
3) Does being opposite create conflicts in
your relationship?
4) What is it about the differences that you
and your partner find exciting and stimulating?
5) Are you both great communicators with the
ability to compromise?
6) Do you find that being opposites help
compliment the relationship as opposed to bringing conflict?
You're a liberal - he's a conservative
You're a vegetarian - he's a meat eater.
You hate comedy movies - he absolutely loves comedy movies.
You love romance –His idea of romance is a cup of coffee
You're an extrovert - he's an introvert.
You’re a clean freak – He picks up when
he feels like it
As opposites each partner has to not only
make compromises, they have to realize the situation. You may be
able to deal with the differences in a short term relationship,
but in long term, are these differences going to cause conflict
with life plans each of you have?
Every aspect of your social life with an
opposite is affected. Simple things such as choosing a movie to
see or rent, certain foods when
dining, music when listening to in the car or at home, the
daytime/nocturnal war, if you’re a night owl and your partner is
an early riser.
Although all these situations can be
discussed and negotiated on, with opposites you have to be
prepared to lose a part of both of you to make it work. But this
negotiation has to be mutual and both have to give up parts of
their lifestyle they are accustomed to build a new lifestyle both
can agree on.
There is a level of excitement with an opposite.
Everything is new, adventurous and of course different. You see an
element of what you want to be in that person as they see it in
you. Having a strong
ability to compromise, being open minded and creating an
environment where both you can feel secure and content as well as
understanding an opposite’s relationship can be successful and
fulfilling.
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Copyright
2005
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